Brain-Jockey

Raising Radicals

Written by Audrie Zettick on May 6, 2009

It’s every conservative mother’s dream. You know, raising a radical. No, I’m not talking about a Saul Alinsky type. I’m talking kids that think for themselves. They might not always agree with you but they won’t be drinking anybody else’s koolaid© either.

 

In the Urban Dictionary, a good definition of radical is “a person subscribing to a political ideology supporting massive, unmeasured, and rapid change.” The definition contrasts radicalism with conservatism, which is defined as a philosophy that advocates minimum change. In today’s society, conservatives ARE the radicals and to be one requires thinking for yourself.

 

I’m not claiming to be a perfect parent. Many uses of duct tape have crossed my mind more than once when dealing with an out-of-control 7- year old. But last week, I had confirmation that I’d done some things “right.” Dear daughter, age 15, and I were conversing about voter registration—more accurately, I was talking while driving, she was mumbling at the speed of light.

 

In typical teen fashion, she rolled her eyes then mumbled something about how ALL the kids turning 18 were registering Democrat.

 

Well, I said, all they’ve known in their lifetime is George Bush, John McCain and Barack Obama via the mainstream media. Can you really blame them? With disdain, she blurted, “Yeah, well, they didn’t do their homework.”

 

Their bad. My good. A daughter who thinks.

 

And it wasn’t the first time. She recently came home from school, ready to exercise the new synapses created that day in her brain. Her American Cultures class was studying the Great Depression. “Mom, did you know that some people actually think the New Deal programs ended the depression. Duh….. It was WWII that did.” (Eyeballs rolling).

 

Yeah, I’ll settle for “duh.” Duh here means “that’s so lame, he/she is such a doofus.”

 

In short, how do we grow kids who question today’s group-think mentality and conventional wisdom? Here’s a short list.

 

• Have Issues. Use everyday observations of everyday life to discuss how people make decisions and the repercussions of those decisions. Since my kids were babies, we’ve discussed how there are often unintended yet logical consequences to decisions, whether made by individuals or the government. 
• Don’t Preach. Yes, this one’s tough, especially if you’re passionate about your issues. But preaching can drive anyone to the other side. Rather than preach, layout your thinking to your kids, at whatever level they are ready for. Contrast it with the other side of the issue. My 7 year old and my 15 year old have both heard me describe issues to them, whether abortion, voting, taxes or the like–but in different language. 
• If you’ve ever changed your mind on an issue, admit it. Right and wrong doesn’t evolve, but it’s good for kids to know that positions on issues can evolve, as facts become known and understanding deepens. And frankly, it makes mom and dad seem more human. (And really, don’t you hope all those folks who voted for Obama, support abortion on demand or were initially grateful for government bailouts will someday rethink their positions?) 
• Moderate media and other “inputs.” It’s your job to counterbalance what your kids are exposed to in news media, entertainment and academia. Sometimes, that may means avoiding it altogether, but often it means being there to explain what is being viewed, said or done and offer your perspective. Call me anal, but until recently, I read every book my daughter had to read in school, as well as popular fiction like Harry Potter, in case she wanted to read it. 
• But don’t censor. Teaching a kid to think for themselves means letting them see the other side (when appropriate, of course). Frankly, anyone can hold up their end of the argument better if they know how the other side frames their argument. I’ve taught history of science where I’ve had both evolutionists and creationists in class–I defend both of their rights’ to believe and advance their position. Sadly, I’ve had creationists confide to me privately that they don’t want to know or care about evolution. I challenge them: learn to better advance and defend your position by knowing the opposition.

 

I could have censored Harry Potter, purposefully keeping my daughter from reading it–after all, we do attend an evangelical church–but I didn’t. We talked through the controversy, discussing underlying themes, our beliefs, how some were interpreting the book, using it to advance different agendas, etc. I ended up liking and reading the entire series; she had no interest and didn’t read a word of it. (Of course, what adolescent really wants to read what their mom is reading anyway–perhaps this is a good strategy?).

 

The most important thing: get them involved. I grew up with a role model–my mother–who started a local taxpayers’ group and went on to be the first woman elected county commissioner. Even without going on to such lofty heights, we can show our kids that their opinions and voices matter and they can make a difference. My daughter went with me to the Harrisburg Tax Day Tea Party, where we were interviewed by the local ABC affiliate. We’re both “Smart Girls” (see here on Smart Girl Politics and Smart Girl Nation).

 

And, by the way, duct tape came in useful that day too. It’s great for the construction of radical protest signs.